The Furry Monkey

01 JANUARY 2009
AT THE SEASIDE

Yes, another New Year to celebrate.  It’s a strange and melancholy time of year isn’t it.  Christmas is over and the celebrations are all finished.  The New Year looms large and sadly it’s not a good one so far.

My friend has been in and out of the Hospice since December and it’s so strange really.  It’s not a position I’d ever think she’d be in and it’s difficult for everyone.  We’ve been friends for over 20 years and worked together for many years, that’s how we got to know each other – we had the offices next door to each other in the West Wing (sounds grand huh – well it was in an old Mansion so I suppose it was!).

John has been ill with his leg ulcer which is getting worse and not improving.  I did get involved for a while as I told you, but I didn’t get any thanks for it, more the opposite to be honest.

Mum has not been well and the Docs are changing her tablets.  She has some quick mood swings but won’t accept it.  Others can see this, but not her.  It’s me who is normally at the short end of the stick, the same as with John. 

Most of the time I am quite happy, although in pain as usual, but it’s only when I get ‘got at’ that I get upset with things.  Not suprising really is it.

Bertie has been in and out of the animal hospital and it’s costing me an arm and a leg to keep the vets looking after him.  As he’s 16 bless him, no insurance company will touch him so it’s down to me to keep paying the vets.  It’s not like you can pay it over time, it has to be paid at the time of the consultation as all you pet lovers will know only too well.

Domi is being naughty and we think it’s because Bertie is getting a bit more attention.
And last....me...well my health isn’t that great to be honest.  The old Blood Pressure is sky high and it’s not surprising really is it.  How can you keep it low like the Doctors say when all this is going on???

I’m also having problems elsewhere but I can’t say much about that suffice to say that it’s not helping my BP at all.  Stil it has made me make some decisions which is good.  Don’t panic it’s nothing health related.

Anyway so the title of this wasn’t “Woe is me at the moment” it was “At the seaside” and that is where we went on the first day of 2009 and it’s freezing cold!  What we didn’t know was that there was a charity event called the “Big Dip” going on where people go into the sea and raise money!  Yikes, not just your feet either but your whole body or it doesn’t count.  How would you feel about a dip in the sea on the 1st January?!?!?!?  No me neither!

We went into a restaurant there and there was one table left so we nabbed it!  Luckily someone else soon left and we got a bigger table to sit at.  Us with all our leg problems makes it difficult to sit at certain angles and we all need to put our legs in different directions – perhaps we should’ve been an octopus instead!  One leg each at any angle...LOL!

05 JANUARY 2009
AT A&E – NOT ME THIS TIME!

No it’s not me again.  It’s John.  His leg is playing up again and he’s had a huge lump appear and it’s really painful.  It’s very near the other ulcer and it’s time to go to A&E again.  He wasn’t keen but decided in the end it’d be the best thing.  He has to go back to work tomorrow so it’s best to get it sorted now isn’t it really.  Gosh the things that happen to us, sometimes you’d think it was a “WOW New Blockbuster out now!  All new Z-listers with exciting events happening daily!!”.  If I could make it all go away tomorrow I would but that’s life isn’t it.  It doesn’t happen like that.

So how long did we have to wait this time?  Well about a similar time to last.  John was almost ready to walk out when we were seen.  After all that what did the A&E Doctor say?  “Oh I think we’ll let it burst on it’s own and you can go”.  “Hey” said I “what if you do something about it, would it ease the pain and pressure?” “Well yes” he replied “wait here a moment and I’ll check”.  With that off he went as fast as his little legs would carry him!  We thought that would be the last we’d see of him for a while and we weren’t wrong – although he did eventually come back to us and called us in again.  This time he said “Come with me” to John and he followed him in to another room and I stayed in the original one, I wasn’t keen on seeing that.  Although I’ve seen loads of gory things (mainly my own!) I’m not keen on others sometimes!

Eventually John came back and he said he’d nearly killed him.  He had syringed the ‘goo’ out and then squeezed it.  It was a lot in the syringe, so imagine how it would’ve been to send us home and let it burst on it’s own with no dressings and no knowledge of what to do when it did!  Do this people pass exams and really know what they’re doing in A&E?  Sometimes I wonder and think we could do a better job with our common sense and previous health knowledge so far!

We then had to wait to see him again as he said John would need some antibiotics.  Now John is allergic to penicillin and also another antibiotic the name of which we told him.  Did they listen?  Did they hell!!!!  So we had to explain he couldn’t take them. “Oh does he swell up?” the Doc asked.  “Err, no not exactly......he stops breathing totally!” we said.  “Oh dear” was the reply.  Not good huh.

Guess what.  We were sent to the waiting room again and told to wait.  We’d been there for ages.  Why don’t they deal with one patient and see it through to the end?  Or at least when they say you need drugs get the prescription to you fairly soon so you can get them instead of leaving you waiting for hours on end! 

The chairs are not the most comfortable in A&E and I mentioned this to John and the answer I got was “Well now you know how it feels when we have to wait for you over and over again in these places when you’re ill!”.  Oops!

After another ½ hour John said “If he doesn’t come back soon I’m off in 5 minutes”.  He doesn’t do patience (no pun intended!) well.  Luckily for us the Nurse came in about 4 minutes and gave us the tablets.

Unluckily for John after reading the piece of paper with it, it said “Do not take if allergic to penicillin” and also that it could bring you out in ulcers!  Not good huh when he already has them and is allergic to it as well so he couldn’t take them.

It was late by the time we got out, too late to call the GP to ask so he had to wait until the next day.  Looks like he won’t be going back to work tomorrow after all.  He’s had hardly any sleep because of the pain and the placement of the lump.  Oh dear...never looks good when not turning up after having Christmas holiday time off does it, but it’s for real.

 

6TH JANUARY 2009
BACK AT THE GP’S AGAIN....

This time it’s for me, my BP check again.  It’s been higher than ever lately and nothing I try to do can stop it going up and up.  I need to make it go down but not having much luck.


As usual, it’s up again.  Anyone got any ideas on how to get it to go down????
Send them to me if you have, I’ve already suggested cutting my arms off them they can’t take the BP but the Doc said they can do it on your legs.  Looks like I’ll just be a head and body then.....well it might work what do you think?!?!?

 

7TH JANUARY 2009
DIABETIC EYE CLINIC (MUM NOT ME)

A rather odd test this one for Mum.  As she’s diabetic they keep an eye (no pun intended!) on the eyes and take a photo of the back of the eye.  I went with her and you have to have drops put in and wait for 20 minutes before they take the photo.
He was very good and asked if we had any questions.  Yes said I – how do you know if there are changes in the eyes related to the diabetes and he said it would show up as spots of blood in the eye and would we like to see the photos?  Of course said I – well I would wouldn’t I?!?!?! I, get it, eye, get it?!?!?!?  Well I thought it was funny!  Then I would....oh....all these I’s (eye’s!).  Best stop now it’s getting silly!

 

09 JANUARY 2009
LOCAL GP SURGERY

Me again, at the GP’s.  He’s not pleased with the BP but when  he asked me if there was any stress at the moment and I straight away reeled off six things he said “OK stop” and that might explain some of why it is high but not that it is high and low most of the time.

 

16 JANUARY 2009
LOCAL GP SURGERY

BP time for me again and Dr W for Mum.  The other GP has put Mum on some new tablets to see if they help.  She also has high BP.  Perhaps we could have a competition between us, what can the winner win? Nothing to put the BP up further that’s for sure! LOL!

 

22 JANUARY 2009
A VERY VERY SAD DAY

Today my friend Lyn died, her Mum called me to tell me that she’d died at 2.45am.  She has fought this crap disease for so long but in the end it won the fight and she couldn’t fight it any longer.  It’s hard to realise that she won’t be around and we won’t be going out on our little trips anymore.  It’s also hard to realise that she is only six months older than me and this is NOT how it is supposed to be.  Life should NOT be this short.  Life should not end this way in a hospice at this young age.

Don’t get me wrong, hospices are lovely places and they truly do care (well most of the ones I’ve been in do).  However none of us really want to end our days there.  It has scared me that I could end up this way too one day.  I know none of us know how we will end our days but with cancer there are some things that you know may happen. Or odds on that it will happen. It's scary. 

Every day I have to realise again that I can’t just text or email her anything.  We used to understand more than most as we’ve both been through this crap thing called cancer.  However my fight is still ongoing and hers has ended.  I have my own thoughts on cancer and I don’t want it to sound negative, but it’s being realistic and in my head I think realistic is better than denial – or maybe it would be better in denial and not acknowledge it at all.  It certainly makes you think about things.

I’m sitting here crying whilst typing this, it’s not sadness for me, but for my friend.  OK I know she is no longer in pain and she is in a better place, but it would be better if she was here with us. 

The next thing will be her funeral.  It’s not something that I thought I would be doing that’s for sure.  If anything I thought she’d be at mine first.  Life has a way of knocking the stuffing out of you and it’s done that to me at the moment.  So many things going on and none of it I particularly want. 

One day soon I hope it will improve.  How much bad news can one person have going on at any one time?

Sorry this is a gloomy post, but it’s not a good day :-(

Another thing was I had to go to the Docs for another BP test.  Not good again, although it was better than I thought it would be bearing in mind what had happened earlier this morning.

 

28 JANUARY 2009
JOHN HOSPITAL APPOINTMENT

At the hospital and it’s not me for a change.  This time it’s John.  His leg ulcers have not been healing and at last they’ve decided to refer him on and this is the first appointment to find out why not.  His consultant asked lots of questions and was very thorough.  He also had to give six tubes of blood and three urine samples. 
No time for a coffee either, shame as that hospital does lovely coffee!!  Perhaps next time?!?!?!

 

29 JANUARY 2009            
LOCAL GP SURGERY AGAIN

Hey guess what I’m here having.  No it’s not a special coffee, no it’s not a party, no it’s not someone giving me a hug and making the day better.  It’s me having another BP test.  Not good again.  Better than before, but still not good enough.  It could be that I put in a repeat prescription for John expecting to collect it and it not being there.  It’s happened to us a lot before and we can’t work out if it’s the Chemist or the Doctor Surgery who are not telling us the total truth.  None of them will admit if they’ve not done as they should so it’s us that have the hassle and have to chase everything from beginning to end.  No one else we know has the problems that we do trying to get repeat prescriptions.

 

30 JANUARY 2009
DOC APPOINTMENT AGAIN

Well the BP isn’t down as much as it should do so it’s now time for more drugs to see if they help.  I hope they are not as bad as they were last time. 

Apart from the high BP, the pain in my legs is not good and the pain patches are taking quite a hit lately.  That and the increased pain killers.  If only pain wasn’t constant it would give us all a break wouldn’t it.  Headaches every day doesn’t help either.  One day I hope that I will have no pains at all but I won’t be holding my breath just yet.

I’ve had some good news, well not good as such, but I’ve managed to sort out with the help of my friends and my friends parents transport to her funeral.  It’s been worrying me as obviously I want to go but was worried I wouldn’t be able to get there.  Now that is solved.  Phew.