It's December again, it comes around so quickly doesn't it. I've recently had some good news about a Patron for The Crest - Mr Briggs has agreed to be one of our Patrons - isn't that fantastic! There'll be an article in our next newsletter hopefully - assuming that I get sent the details of course. I know things take time but I do get impatient with people and timescales sometimes.

Recently (not related to Mr B though!) I've emailed several cancer charities and also some independent companies regarding different things and no one has had the courtesy to even reply. How bad is that. I always reply to people who take the time to email me....no matter what it is about. Why is there no courtesy in the world these days?

I should get the BBC to start a "Gumpy Women" programme, I'll be on it. Now what else is there? Oh yes, people who promise to do things for you and NEVER do. Why bother saying yes if you have NO intention of doing it. It's not a lot to ask is it.

Also, our NFH have just had a delivery of building materials. More months of hell I suppose. Just when things had started to calm down there. What a nightmare. Stress is NOT good for cancer or any illness - I wish these people would move. We've now got a nice neighbour on the other side, so for once we'd like good ones on both sides.

Perhaps now is the time to seriously consider moving. Once I get my health sorted that is what I'd love to do. Get away from all these nuisances and just concentrate on the things that really matter.

So that is my moan over for now. I'm now off to have a nice hot coffee and write some christmas cards. I can't do any printing as my printer is dying on me and I can't update something for a website as I need Studio MX and haven't got the money to buy it. If anyone knows of any cheap deals on the software, PLEASE let me know!!!!

On that note I will close for now. I have a few appointments this month, so will update you later on.

It's not all bad though, keep smiling! It MUST get better soon!!!!!

Well I've made it to another birthday! I feel quite old now, and I think I'm going to go backwards in numbers instead to make it easier when people ask my age. Mind you loads of people say I don't look it so I don't mind too much.

Thanks to everyone who sent me cards - both real and virtual ones. Also all the lovely pressies I was given as well, so many lovely things. It's a shame having a birthday in December as you do tend to get overlooked and miss out really. People say "oh it's birthday and Christmas together" - who else gets that huh. Anyway it was a lovely day and although I had to do some Christmas shopping, we still had a gorgeous meal out and had a wonderful day.

Three appointments in one day. Dr C, The Lymphoedema Clinic and the Palliative Pain Clinic. I was concerned about the transport but it arrived.

I was concerned about my appt with Dr C as some of you know about but I am happy to tell you I saw her registrar instead which suits me fine. He's a nice guy and quite happily told me about my results and also answered a couple of questions I had. I was pleased that it had gone so well and was relieved too.

Next on the list was Jan at the Lymphoedema Clinic. I had to take in both stockings and she confirmed that they were the same as I suspected. She measured my leg and although it has increased it is in the right place which is great. She also measured it for custom stockings in case the next one to try didn't work. The compression level has been increased so they are extremely difficult to get on, specially with a cat to help as well who thinks it's a good game!

They made my legs ache a lot and I was so pleased to get them off at the end of the day I can tell you. I put them on straight after my shower and they come off when I go to bed. I don't like not having something on my legs with the cats around. They wouldn't deliberately do anything but they can catch you with their claws which wouldn't help one bit.

We had a chat whilst she was working - poor girl she's broken her toe so it wasn't easy to move around on the floor whilst measuring my legs. I really like seeing her as she makes me feel so much better. I know I'm a positive person but sometimes I could just cry and still don't know why. It just happens.

Anyway next was the Pain Clinic but sadly - they had all gone on a conference - even though they knew about my appointment! What a pain (no pun intended!) that was. So now I have to wait to get another appointment. Why does nothing happen as it should do - there is always something that doesn't go right.

This is another appointment that doesn't worry me at all as he is so nice. He answers questions and is honest with me. I like that and if I trust someone then that is all I need to feel safe. A lovely lady driver in an ambulance picked me up and there was only one other patient, from Epsom who was already in there so off we went on our merry way in the groovy bus to the hospital.

They were running late though and it was over 1.1/4 hours before I got in to see him. The odd thing is the other patient had his appointment at 3pm and went in first and mine was at 2pm and I went in after him! He had x-rays and was back out again quite quickly.

Dr C was also in there with Mr B which I wasn't expecting at all. I mentioned about my right foot and the pains I've been experiencing and he sent me for x-rays of both legs. I had to wait ages in the x-ray department and then finally they found my form and took me in next. I was told transport patients have priority but it didn't work that time. Luckily I didn't have to take my clothes off as it's my legs being x-rayed! ;-)

I then had to get back in the queue to see Mr B. He was examining my x-rays when I went in and said my tibia is now looking a lot better which I saw so that is great news. He said my right foot should calm down and if it doesn't to let him know. The pains are horrendous sometimes but I'll see how it goes. He said I'd done remarkably well with everything and was pleased with me. He has a knack of making me feel good just like Jan whereas others just upset me for days sometimes weeks which is NOT what I need.

Whilst there I also thanked him in person for agreeing to be a Patron of The Crest. It's a fantastic thing to do and I much appreciate it.

It was a bit of a nightmare coming home as we followed signs and they just disappeared on us! We eventually got home after 3.5 hours! I was SO SO SO tired but at least we had a nice ride around and saw all sorts of Christmas lights which was lovely to see. I had to ring John at one stage just to check we were going the right way and my memory was right - I remembered something which pleased me!

(Oh yes if you know where it is Mr B as I honestly don't then it will be changed - you are the best Doctor I know as I've told you!!).

Happy Christmas to one and all and I hope you have a fantastic New Year too.

It's been a strange year, still more medical things and an operation too. I'm still convinced its harder to deal with cancer after the treatment than whilst going through it sometimes. I don't mean the physical stuff but what it does inside your head. Sometimes I find myself just feeling like I could cry for England in the Olympics.

It doesn't help that when people have a go at me, I was told to just walk away. It's the best thing rather than just give comments back but then I get told I'm stroppy so I can't win.

Recently all I've had is bad news, friends with their cancers and lymphomas returning and others who have died fighting it. It does get to you and it makes you think.....I am a positive person but it still gets to me.

So, apart from that - Christmas at home this year. We normally go away to my cousins for the day but this time we decided to have Christmas at home instead and then John can have a drink without worrying about driving us all back home. It was a lovely day (apart from the NFH hammering and drilling - yes on Christmas Day!!).

We had a nice card from our new neighbour on the other side and that was nice. As I write this the PITA ones are still hammering!).

So to one and all a Happy Christmas 2004!